“ME Time“, and how I really set aside a few minutes for it…
Well, I am a mom but I am not a new mom. I am a mother from a couple of years now. Clearly, as another mother, my life has moved and revolved around my kids. And the best part about this is I am absolutely happy with this :).
So the question here is – Being a mom do I have that “ME Time“? Time which I used to have when I was single or even married but no kids?
As far as I’m concerned, “ME Time” is a massive myth for moms. Being a mom you cannot imagine a second without your kids. Even if they are off to school, they are on your mind.
Once you are a mom its kind of crazy actually to think about all the different roles we play in a day. Being a mom is tiring and draining. It requires a lot of hard work, discipline, lots of putting your kids first. I was a working mom for almost 5 years. So when I compare the two I find at home mom is more stressful than working mom.
In a role play of being a happy mom, I do try to have some free moments for myself but I don’t tag them as “ME Time“. During “ME Time” also I know my life revolves around my kids.
And do you really want to know why I am calling them as free moments rather than “ME Time“?
Here I go…… Meet me in my “ME Time” which leads to the discovery of “free moments“:-
TV time with the never-ending list of to-do’s:
When it comes to watching a movie in the night when kids slept, most of the times even I doze off before the movie ends. And Hindi movies are too long, can’t afford to sleep so late because my alarm will start ringing 5:30 am in the morning saying “Kids school”. Found a solution to this “Let’s watch an English movie“, short and sweet, started loving “Romedy” 9 pm show. While watching a movie when the ad comes, I get up to go and fill up the water bottles and put them in bags, soak the almonds. Come back and get glued again to the tv. In the next ad break take out the school dress from almirah and keep it ready on the couch so that in morning no rushing and searching for belts and ID cards. In the next ad break hubby comes and says,”can you just put the contents for tea in the pan for me as my combination of water, milk, tea leaves and sugar is never perfect“. Many times I club the movie time with self-pampering by applying a face pack in the ad break times.
So while watching a movie also my to-do list was not ending and so if somebody categorized it as “ME Time“, I don’t agree.
Choice of the sport depends on a liabilities lying at home:
Another one is I recently started learning tennis (only a 30 min class, 2 days a week ;)) and everyone around me is like “good you have time for this, at least your own tennis time“.
Tennis!!! How come I started playing tennis. There are two reasons to it.The major one is, three boys in the house they play tennis and my husband on his official trip to the US bought an expensive Wilson racquet for my elder one. But after seeing the racquet reaction comes is “papa you don’t know, I stopped playing tennis” and now I am only gonna play baseball. Wow!!!So as a responsible mom how can I let go that money waste when everyone in a family already having their appropriate tennis racquets except me. And secondly on weekends when the boys play tennis with their dad they put me on a job of a ball boy as I didn’t know how to play. So I thought of this extra racquet as an opportunity to convert my weekend role model of collecting balls to tennis star :). And then comes, see you play tennis and you have your “ME Time” in tennis.
Where I find it as a proper utilization of resources so that I can use those skills for better practice sessions for my kids. And of course my wellness too.
Some daily routines and basic care here and there:
Sitting in a salon you are calculating time on your hand vs what all services you can get done in that time.Stop trying to make basic maintenance something special.
Sipping your evening tea, dinner menu and next day kids lunch box menu is on your mind.
Out for shopping and your monitoring your watch as you have to be at bus stop at a fixed time to pick your kids.
I’m using the restroom for basics, not spending hours at a spa retreat.
Evening walks, either you running behind your kid’s cycling or walking in a direction where you can keep an eye on your kids while they are playing with their friends.
Reading a magazine or newspaper, watching tv, drinking tea is certainly no “ME Time.” Oh, and when I’m on the bed and I close the door? That’s definitely not “ME Time.” I’m getting ready for the next day.
Discovery of “free moments” :
I do love my workouts, my tea times, my tv time, girly get-togethers. Because these things help me in maintaining my sanity. Taking care of myself helps me in taking care of my family in a much better way.
I can have those “free moments” but not the “ME Time” anymore. Being a mom I enjoy my free moments. I think I am tuned to them now. Being a mother has given me so many best ever lifetime memories to cherish. So I think I am satisfied with my free moments.
But do take a bit of time for yourself and be kind to yourself.
From a mom to mom :
Take a note kids really grow fast and we should not take that for granted. They will be with us for the fraction of their lives, don’t want to miss being a part of that. Soon for them, another circle of life will start. And for me, “free moments” will start converting into more of “ME Time“.
Over to you moms out there:
Please share your idea of mom’s “ME Time” and help in sharing my ideas with the moms out there.