Celebrating Motherhood At Different Milestones!
Until now I completely and totally used to believe in that when kids start growing they should know how to occupy and entertain themselves.
Small incidence at home changed my belief and I accepted it positively.Because motherhood is a choice I made on my own on a happy note.
My boys were playing some game at home and I was sitting next to them. I was in no mood to play. Being two brothers they have company to each other. They are grown up now to play any game together. But my younger one poked me “Mumma, why don’t you play with us anymore?”
Quickly exchanging into my protective mode, I answered “I don’t get your meaning? Just yesterday morning, I played snakes and ladder with you and over the weekend, we peeled the peas together in the kitchen. What else you need! You are a big kid now and you have your elder brother with you to play all the time, you should realize how to possess and engage yourself. Mom can’t be your excitement constantly. I’ve to take care of other things too around the house.”
He shrugged and I returned to looking through my phone. Be that as it may, his blameless perception waited in my brain. It was constantly running at the back of the brain and it obviously hit my heart.
I generally took pride in myself being an included parent. Never felt guilty for avoiding kids because of work duties or other things at hand as I constantly keep in mind to remunerate the lost hours with quality family time. Always enjoyed feeding my kids on my own even having other help available, always loved preparing them for school, preparing their lunch tiffins is my favorite thing, reading stories to them, playing with them and doing senseless things together.
But things gradually change when my kids start growing little independent. There were not any more loud voice from the washroom declaring “I’m done”.They began washing and cleaning after themselves. Shower times moved toward becoming mom free. There are days where after waking them up I directly meet them on the breakfast table.
Henceforth looking for a mom for umpteenth tidbit time gradually diminished. They finished their homework in the evenings as scheduled. Both of them are well trained for their nightly routine of change, brush, prayer, and bed.
All of a sudden I was compensated with some leisure time! Woww!! I was excited!! I restored a few of my leisure activities – daily night ritual of watching a movie with a luxury of sleeping a little late, social media, of course, more coffee with friends! In little parts, it nearly felt like the joyful days before kids were born. I persuaded myself that I earned this personal time (may I say “ME Time”).
And believe me, I hated any sort of interruption to my any schedule related to “ME Time” because I earned that time after so many years. I really wished my kids to carry out their activities close to flawlessness so I did not need to venture in. I snapped frequently and nagged often. Because they need to finish their routine on time as “ME Time” depends on finishing their routine on time.In return which can really lead to irritation many times. As a mom of two boys, I can actually blame it on them but as a conscious mother somewhere in my heart I knew few things could be corrected at my end too!
In my earliest childhood memories, I still remember my mom used to play badminton with me. And I clearly remember while writing Hindi school work when my hands used to pain, she used to write a few lines for me to motivate me. So when my children are creating and storing their childhood memories, it better be happy and interesting, at least I can try.
Adjusting gadget time:
I prefer to do my media time when kids are off to school. Once they are back from school I prefer to keep gadgets away. Kids park time is my park time too. They go to play without the phone so even I go down to play or walk without the phone. In any case, I am very much physically reachable if required.
I’m focusing on reading and writing, keeping interesting books just in my reach. Weekends are becoming more outdoors with early mornings. Thanks to my new hobby of cycling so those late night movies are gone days. Which in turn is helping in keeping a check on mood swings and unnecessary irritation. This is helping.
Adjusting expectation from boys:
I am still working on this part. I was expecting flawlessness little too early from my boys, overlooking that they are still so little and as yet learning.
Few more years of helping hands occasionally are more convenient instead of nagging and lecturing.
And this adjustment is for my own peace of mind and this is helping!
I have realized it’s important to have a mutually agreed schedule with growing kids. That timetable should have all the categories from study to sports to entertainment to media time whatever growing kids demand. As a parent, we just need to guide them on the moderation of time for each activity. So I prefer to start the day with an agreeable timetable. Now they know when to study and do their chores and when is the screen time.
The emergencies have diminished drastically…and I’m referring to myself here. 😉
Creating experiences as a mode of family fun:
Vacations in resorts with luxury around are replaced with zoo visits, trekking to near mountains, visiting monuments, museums, and places with historic and cultural importance. And in the weekdays it really helps them in choosing the creative writing topic with ease.
Love to click a lot of pictures around such places and making beautiful memories for life long.
Make sleep time… story time on Friday and Saturday nights:
Friday and Saturday bedtimes are fun. Because my boys tell the characters and their dad creates the story around them. So creativity at its peak. This wins him a great deal of much love from both the kiddos.
There cannot be any definite list to make our time together more meaningful and joyful.
And every mom out there has their own story to share. And I really trust every mom’s way of handling their little stuff at home!
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